Your boyfriend is making a choice when it comes to his sexual activities that is as real as if he were having sex with some woman living down the road. As for his excuse that it’s 'only pornography', it’s hardly worth the breath it took him to offer itĪlthough the internet offers us all far greater opportunities for expanding our sexual horizons, it doesn’t absolve us of our accountability. I’d rather believe in our ability to evolve and adapt even if it means taking personal responsibility for our actions. Any denial of that connection insinuates that we are guided only by impulse, like the rest of the animal kingdom, with no ability to see beyond the behavioural patterns we’ve been programmed with for millennia. He may like to cast himself as an avatar, out there on a great big solo cyber adventure, but it’s his real brain and his real body that are engaged in these acts of infidelity.Įven “meaningless sex”, is an activity our mind has chosen. If your boyfriend wants to engage in a second life online he can’t really expect it to run concurrent with the one in which you two are dating. Sex with someone else, even in a virtual scenario, is sex with someone else. The bad news is he’s already cheating on you. We are in our 20s and I’m worried this pattern of behaviour will end up with him cheating on me in the future. He has apologised, promised to stop and I have forgiven him. I also pointed out the double standards, as he wouldn’t be happy with this behaviour from me, which he accepted. Am I right to be upset about this? I confronted him and he said he considers it as porn, but I don’t, as it is an interaction with another woman who also sees him. Recently I found out he has been having Skype sex with other women (I think only porn stars). The dilemma My boyfriend and I have been together for three years, we rarely fight and have planned our future lives together.

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